Sexual phantasies – the online counseling

(Part 12 from: The Man-Woman-conflict from evolutionary-psychological view)
(How spiritual assessments from the primeval times guide and influence love relationships)

The inner cinema outwits evolution

In ancient times it was not the “stated goal” of the homo sapiens evolution to define the behaviour or time spent in relationships as strictly monogamous let alone life-long. Most likely mankind is made for medium-term relationships with a trend towards polygamy or infidelity.

For a long-term relationship in the 21st century that results in a few unpleasant facts. One of those is the often-observed sexual reluctance in a marriage which affects women more often than men. Neuro- physiological mechanisms that are millions of years old serve as the culprit in the female subconscience – to end relationships by means of sexual frustration.

A milder version of this is the decreasing sexual attraction a long-term husband has on his wife. Even if after years of marriage she still has an interest to have sex with him, the sexual routine between them often does not create enough sexual energy to reach an orgasm.

Sexual fantasies often help to avoid this psychobiological trap, into which a weakening libido draws them.

Women with a well-developed sexuality and phantasy sometimes achieve to avoid the psychological trap in which a decreasing libido is trying to pull her into in a long-term relationship.

She uses her inner cinema with an abundant archive of sexual material to be able to build up enough energy during the sexual encounter. Women do not like to address the delicate subject of sexual phantasies because through this, the sensitive male ego could get chipped away at.

This is justifiable because the man gets “degraded to a background actor”, while the leading role gets played by an imaginary “super guy”. First of all, it takes getting used to for a man, when he finds out that it is Brad Pitt who gives his wife such great orgasms. Alternatively: What is she supposed to do?

This is why men should be glad and thankful that their partners successfully play a trick on nature to sustain their love life.

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