Primeval times and love life – the online counseling

 (Part 1 from: The Man-Woman-conflict from evolutionary-psychological view)
(How spiritual assessments from the primeval times guide and influence love relationships)
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Divorce...

Divorce…

What is going on with our twosome relationships?

Facing the high divorce numbers and separation ratio, many have asked themselves this. Have all the ones willing to separate made a mistake and happened to come across the wrong one?

Do women and men fundamentally not fit together? Does it make sense to strive for a long-term relationship and to have children, while there is a high possibility that the union fails. What about couples who won’t separate and stay together all their lives?

Looking at many of these, one does not get the feeling that they are happy….Questions over questions!

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“That is the core of the matter!” determines an astonished Faust in Goethe’s identically named tragedy, as he identifies the devil Mephistopheles in his disguised form (Goethe is a famous german poet).

With this work, I state the question: “What is the human’s core?” Here, I will try to give you –honored readers – answers to this.

With us – the homo sapiens – this is anything but easy, because we, as cultural beings, are covered by the veneer of our civilization. If you scratch it off, you will see, deep down in our subconsciousness our true self…..Each species on this earth has such a self, such a unique nature, with which they differentiate themselves from all other species.

African savannah – the cradle of humankind

savanne

Living beings have tools to survive

The nature of humans and animals has evolved throughout the course of millions of years to adapt to two requirements: First, to stay alive and second, to successfully reproduce. Humankind had to face countless life- and reproduction problems, which occurred over and over again in its evolution. Because of this, hundreds, even thousands of different behavioural adaptations have developed to handle these problems. These adaptions, like evolution biologists call them, naturally play a central character in our love life.

They resemble innate inerrant characters from primeval times, which activate themselves spontaneously and subconsciously when the situation calls for it.

Here is an example – not based on our love life – but you will identify what mattered throughout the evolution:

snake

Nonvenomous snake

 “Help, a snake”, is the piercing alarm call not only used by children, when a harmless grass snake seeks its way fearfully away from the lake. Or a housewife, who drags herself up the basement stairs with a face white as chalk and close to unconsciousness, only because an extra fat daddy-long-legs crossed her way downstairs.

 Phobic reactions in this vehemency are explainable due to the fact that humankind has a million year old deep fear of spiders and snakes, which serve the crystallization core of this abnormal fear.

 

...and deadly green mamba

…and deadly green mamba

It was a big advantage in the tropical Africa of primeval times, if one was afraid of these creatures. Ancestors who did not pay attention to these critters had to suffer dearly: They died from the bite, which resulted in having less descendants than those who reacted carefully and fearfully.

With time, the careless would be suppressed more and more by those, who avoided dangerous animals and passed on that fear to their descendants.

All other behavioral adjustments that form the core of our inner self, have evolved out of the same principle…..They are the core of the matter!

 

They are navigated by a group of nerve cells, which are characteristically linked up and connected with one another and which always have to fulfill only a special task.

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Love life is still in archaic modus

paar

 

In the 21st century, we are sadly in the unfortunate situation that we have to deal with a brain construction in our modern life, which is actually designed for the primeval times, because the time which has passed was insufficient to alter the old programs. The strong vulnerability of humans to emotional sickness and psychological disorder should be attributed for most part to the not ideal adaptation.

The Man-Woman-conflict from evolutionary-psychological view: next page

 

 

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